Weekend thinking

A) I have a stomach-ache from Girl Scout Cookies. Worth. Every. Bite.

B) Who is seeing Loverboy and Eddie Money this weekend? That's right. Suck it.

C) Sopranos is on in T minus eleven.

D) I spent the morning putting all of my sweaters away and getting out all of my spring/summer clothes. So if it snows tomorrow, that's all me. Sorry kids.

See, this is why I haven't posted for a while.

Friends of ours

So I sold out. We knew that I would. FYI to all of my friends: stop being such cheap-asses and get cable. Then maybe I wouldn't have to get HBO. Selfish, selfish, selfish.

Can I afford HBO? Not so much. Did I still get it? Yes I did. Will I be enjoying some Sopranos? A little too much. Will I be cancelling as soon as this season is over? Without a doubt. Did I flirt with the cable person on the phone so I could get my installation fee waived? With no shame. Did I feel like Queen Retard when one of my friends informed me that they do that for everyone? Uh, not at all.

Out like a lamb

Dear Pullman,

Yeah, sorry about that snow outside. My fault, since only yesterday I was celebrating the spring-like weather we were experiencing. I keep forgetting where I live. In like lion . . .

~Ace

Random Monday thoughts

Monday's top five reasons for celebrating:

1) Just another day before I leave for vacation. On said vacation I will be assisting in mending a fence (give me a hammer, that sounds like a good idea), golfing (or whatever it is that I do on the golf course is called), holding my very tiny nephews (who had better not spit up on me), reading (fiction, oh that blessed fiction), watching cable on a big screen TV (and yes, I know what happened last night on The Sopranos, but I still plan on watching the replay later this week), and doing nothing else.

2) I just got a killer deal on my flight to Atlanta. That I still can't afford. But I'm justifying it since it is a school/work trip. And it still gets me out of here.

3) My huntress of a cat killed three mice. This was all outside, for the record.

4) I'm semi on spring break. And I loves me some good non-work time.

5) The weather is warming up and appearing to be spring-like.

I'm 56% evil

One of my friends just sent me this link to find out how evil I actually am. If you are too lazy to click (shame! Even I'm not that lazy) here are some sample questions:

Did you ever spit in anyone's milk?
Have you ever laughed at a fat person?
Have you divulged someone's deep, dark secret?
Would you kill someone for one million dollars if you were guaranteed to never get caught?

And I answered all of the questions honestly, and still am only 56% evil. I think that's enough to get me up with a visit with Floyd the Barber. And only one person is going to get that, but it's funny. Trust me. So go take the quiz. We all have a bit of evil in us, some of us are just less apologetic about it than others.

Weekend's here . . .

I love weekends. Pullman is essentially emptied out, and is it wrong that I love it when all the students are gone? I had the coffee shop all to myself today to do work. Of course, after an hour of work, I decided it was time to go home and do some non-school reading.

And since I'm reading The Cell by Stephen King, I will no longer be using my cell phone. Ever. Or until I'm bored and decide to call someone. Whichever comes first.

Speaking of first, can I just say that I'm the best golfer ever? If by best I mean worst. I forgot how bad I was, but I was still christened Tigress Woods. By the guy who beat me by Lord knows how much. I do like my new nickname, though.

And if anyone happened to tape The Sopranos tonight, please to be sending me the tape. And don't call me and tell me who got whacked until I've watched it. I'm hoping Paulie Walnuts is the first to go. I don't know why, but I've got a soft spot for Silvio so I hope he's safe. Damn, I need HBO. If you are still feeling generous after sending me the tape, you can go ahead and hook me up with some cable too.

Uh, just for The Sopranos.

Yeah.

California Dreamin'

Thanks to some comments yesterday from Laura and Dwayne, all I'm craving right now is some barbecued food. Things preventing me from eating said grilled foods: (a) It is currently somewhere in the 30s outside and (b) I have no barbecue grill.

Seriously, though, how good does a grilled steak and some corn-on-the-cob sound? When does summer get here? More importantly, when does this freaky cold weather end? Maybe tonight I will sit outside on my pseudo-porch and drink a daiquiri and pretend that it is July. While I wear my winter coat.

My life may be complete . . .

So I'm back home. Ah, vacations. So short. But I'm going on another one next week, so I guess I shouldn't complain. And, upon my return home, my little dog greeted me warmly by throwing up. Twice.

Anyways, here are just five little tidbits from my trip (with perhaps more to come later, depending on my boredom level. I live in Pullman, though, so I'm expecting that level to reach new heights.)

5. On our way back from Vegas, my friend Jim and I stayed in Salt Lake City. We watched the news and were SHOCKED by the lead story. Lead as in top story. As in first of the news show. Apparently there are gay cowboys in UTAH!! No! Oh yes, it's true and the crack news team broke this story by going live (that's right, live!) downtown to show a reporter pointing to a movie poster of Brokeback Mountain. This news story, which was, just to remind you, the top story, was called "Brokeback Utah." It highlighted two gay cowboys, who specialize in breeding horses. Just as an aside, the fifth story on this killer news cast was about a bomb scare at a local church earlier that morning. Interesting priorities, but whatever.

4. Drunken lady at the table next to us for dinner Saturday night was a great highlight. I'll give her some credit, though, for quickly figuring out that we did not want to be friends with her and discuss what we ordered. After five minutes of, "Did you order the gnocchi? It's great! Order the gnocchi! Order it!" (except hear that much more slurred and loud) she moved on to some other people to harass them. Two best parts: first, although I missed this, Classy Vegas lady took a swig directly from her wine bottle at this semi-fancy restaurant, and second, as her husband/lucky companion stood to exit, he slid by her and she bit him on his *hindquarters*. Bit. Him. Sexy lady.

3. Remind me to post some semi-inappropriate pictures from the wax museum.

2. The Stones were great. Keith Richards gave an eloquent speech before his solo. It went something like this, "Greas-ash, pluish, gruahara luaraisharish. Ha-ha. Vegas youish grua lahsash multhats. Rock!" It still brings tears to my eyes.

1. I was kissed by an Elvis impersonator. That's right. Who loves Vegas, baby?

More to follow.

Open Letter

Dear Elvis-A-Rama,

I love you.

~Ace