All is bright

I think I've had enough time to recuperate to now sum up my Christmas weekend. I ate a lot. And drank a lot. And ate some more. And maybe a bit more.

So the weekend actually kicked off Friday, which was Maryanne's birthday. I'm slowly trying to teach her how to enjoy her birthday. My advice centers around three main points: (1) advertise the day for weeks, or even months, prior to the actual date, (2) don't do anything that could be classified as "work" on the day, and (3) eat lots of cake. She obeyed one of these rules.

But I will say that the birthday cake (which I did not make) was ab-so-lute-ly delicious. Words cannot describe. I love cake. Maryanne did let us put birthday candles on the cake, but there was no singing. Perhaps word has leaked back to her from my "Tainted Love" incident.

After taking out a bottle of champagne and one or two of wine, we went to a movie. Thus endeth the birthday celebration, at least as far as I can remember.

Maryanne had to recover, since the next day was Christmas Eve at her house. I opted to not do the family thing this year (and avoiding a 10-hour drive was a good choice, I've decided), but I did call my family and talked to each of them on the phone. Here is a list of the people I talked to: my dad, my step-mother, my sister, my sister-in-law, my step-brother, his wife, my 5 year-old niece, my 3 year-old niece, my other sister-in-law, my brother-in-law, my 11 year-old nephew, and my 9 year-old niece. Thank the Lord my father didn't try to make me talk to the 2 month-old nephews.

I just wanted to say Merry Christmas to my immediate family. I was supposed to be helping with pre-dinner arrangements, but my "don't worry, I'll be quick" phone call turned into about 40 minutes of semi-awkward conversations with people I don't know that well. Oh, and one of my nieces informed me that Santa was bringing her "everything." Bad news for her: I spent a few days with her this summer, and she is on the naughty list. But I still love her.

Ok, so Christmas Eve dinner was fairly intimate with only 6 of us. It was incredibly good. So, to show my appreciation, I ate a lot. I hate to be rude.

My contribution was a messed-up dessert that my ex's mother always makes. I assisted her in making it many a'time, and she always told me that I didn't listen when she was instructing me on how to make it. Turns out she's right. I blew this dessert.

Luckily I made up for it by painting an ornament for each of the guests, and making another for them out of modeling clay. I'm crafty. In every way.

After dinner, we played Guesstures. I love this game, but I am a curse for whichever team I am playing on. I have never won. But I once gave a memorable rendition of "lingerie." Then we played some drinking game that was cleverly disguised as a board game.

We had a designated driver, for the record. Who got pulled over not once, but twice, on the way home. He actually had to do a road-side the first time, because the smell of alcohol in the car was overwhelming, according to the officer.

But we all made it home safely. And thus endeth Christmas Eve. I have some leftover pie to go eat now, so perhaps I will write more later.